Teaching Your Child About Forgiveness

Posted by Julette Millien at 11/20/2009 1:39 PM
Categories: Parenting
Tags: Family Forgiveness Hour tips for families Forgiveness forgiveness role models
What can you do to teach the forgiveness life lesson to your children?

I can't imagine that an explanation is required for this question.   Teaching our children those life skills and mindsets that are necessary for lasting peace, love, joy, prosperity, success, seems a bit more than obvious.  Is forgiveness a necessary mindset?  Absolutely.  Just think of life without it.  Think of even one day without it.

Not teaching our children about forgiveness is like not teaching them about love.  Teaching them doesn't necessarily mean lectures, pen and paper and boring. The following suggestions are part of the flow of life and they have blessed us immensely!


Our Top Seven:
  1. Model it - I make sure my children and all those young people I spend time with observe forgiveness in action. They see me saying with sincerity to people who push and/or fall into me by accident, "it's OK, no problem, don't worry about it."  They observe us accepting apologies very easily and even lovingly if the person is very uncomfortable.  They see us being helpful to people who have offended us.  They're accustom to us being the peacemakers and communicators.  They observe us in traffic. Even if they don't always practice what we do, we know they have the right model implanted on their hearts.
  2. Discuss it - Find it in movies, news stories and tv shows, pull it out and talk about  how the characters handled different situations and whether the story was more interesting with or without it.
  3. Get personal - Ask about their friendships and their arguments with friends, siblings and other family.   Hear how they're thinking about forgiveness, love and relationships. Gently guide and be there when needed.
  4. Get scriptural - Find relevant scriptures and read the stories around the scripture together.  All religions have something or a lot to say about forgiveness.
  5. Provide examples - If you can't find human examples, go observe how a dog operates with your children.  They can be ignored for hours and with but one call, they're back in your lap loving you like nothing ever happened.
  6. Read together - Find some stories at their reading level and some way above with forgiveness as a theme.  Take turns reading out loud. Discuss and share different endings for the stories...with and without forgiveness.
  7. Forgive them easily - You have the opportunity to practice this daily - well, we do!    When children receive the gift of forgiveness for things they think are pretty big, they really get a huge dose of compassion, mercy and grace.  That goes a long way in their hearts.  They will remember that sensation when something "big" happens to them and they have to forgive someone.   
             Forgiving them does not mean there are no consequences.  When they experience compassion ALONG with the                                       consequences they have reaped, they're able to focus on one thing -the lesson behind the consequences, instead of the guilt,              hurt or anger attached to not being forgiven. 


These actions have reaped huge benefits in our home - increased family time, better students, more laughter and joy and love.  Try it and tell me how it works.  And if you have any other suggestions, please share!

Wishing you abundant peace and joy,
Julette Millien

♥~



    

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